Eating in Miniature

Today’s Meals:

Porringer 1 – 2 eggs, 2 rashers, 3 demitasse coffee with 3 teaspoons of double cream
Porringer 2 – plain yogurt full fat, pot of tea
Porringer 3 – 2 cumberlands, cabbage, 1 glass wine,
Evening coffee – 3 demitasse coffees with 3 teaspoons of double cream

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I have brought out my tiny Victorian pewter cup and saucer from the cupboard and noticed how much this affected ED.  It amazes me how much preconceived ideas are holding me back from new discoveries.

This little cup holds exactly half of the amount in my previous cup. I would need to drink two to equal the one I drink now.  It is strange to drink from, as it is so small, making me feel like I am attempting to drink out of a doll’s play tea set.

It is a lovely cup and saucer and rich with engraving with a sweet spot for initials to be engraved.

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Here is a comparison of my original stainless steel mug that I drank out of for a long time.  The china cup I drink my tea from, and now the tiny pewter cup.  The two larger cups are lovely to drink from, the curved rim is comfortable to the mouth with a smooth sensation that is pleasurable.  The tiny cup is more difficult to drink from, first from the smallness which means more frequent filling, but also the handle is sharp and uncomfortable and the metal gets very hot and it takes timing to wait for the right temperature before drinking.  I was attracted to the idea of a pewter cup to go with my pewter porringer when I first found it.  But the issues with it made me place it in the cupboard as a failed idea.  Or was it?

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Yesterday I took it out of the cupboard and decided to give it another go.  People drink from demitasse cups and live, so what was the real object to drinking from it for myself?  The more I thought about it, the more I realized how much preconceived ideas about food and eating are locked in our heads.

Being a binge eater, my gluttony revolves around unlimited food and drink.  While I know I will eventually stop, I don’t want to know there is a limit when I begin.  I want there to be no controls, no boundaries, I just want to consume.  So small plates, bowls, utensils, cups….all of these things represent boundaries I do not agree to unless I am trying to restrict eating.  When I binge, I do not grab my porringer.  When I drink, I do not grab a small glass.  I want excessive amounts because that is part of the deal, if I go there, I might as well have it all.

Yesterday, I drank coffee and tea from the demitasse cup.  It was annoying.  ED’s voice whined about the repetitive times it took to refill, the hotness of the metal against my lips, the sharp handle on my finger.  But what if this was the only size there was to drink from?  What happens, is I drink less.  It happened last night and this morning, I found myself drinking less than I did using a larger cup.  And while yesterday it was more because of the annoyance of frequent pouring, this morning it was more about simply being satisfied sooner.  I figured I could have 4 cups to match my usual two larger cups, but I was done after 3.  This is the same phenomenon that happens with using the porringer….I get so use to the amount, I feel completely done when it is empty.

So how much of our eating is guided by the containers we consume from?  When in binge mode, I don’t even use plates or bowl, I eat out of the package.  Interesting.  Perhaps having boundaries by using small containers really does set up a switch in the brain to stop when empty.  The actual portion size is purely a matter of habit.

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